Wednesday, May 25, 2005

NO-mor MOR-no

Tuesday, the Justin Morneau medallion coupons came out in the Star Tribune. Usually I've done fine by redeeming the coupon the day after it appears in the paper; but yesterday evening, to be safe, I thought I'd get my Morneau coin before the stores closed for the day. Maybe the first or second stop would be sold out, but I expected to be rewarded by the third or fourth. Wrong. Once again, like I did in my search for the Mauer medallion, I drove around for two hours only to be shut out. All the stores had been long sold out, the clerks didn't even have to check. The girl at the Har-Mar Cub in Roseville said they sold out at 3 o'clock.

The Dramatic Re-enactment

Me: Do you have any of the Morneau medallions?

20 Year-Old Cub Service Counter Queen:
(smiling) No, sorry. We sold out at 3 this afternoon!

(slumps, rolls eyes, mutters) They really needed to make more of those things.

(purses lips, uncomfortable silence)


Exit, stage right.

Now imagine the scene replaying over a dozen times through the course of a couple hours, with intermissions for driving from setting to setting, until the protagonist loses his mind. It's a comedy, you see. An absurd, dada comedy. Or maybe something existential, like Beckett. With some of the clerks, I think we could have even acted out the whole scene in mime. I could've played it like Buster Keaton, or Mummenschanz.

On my word of honor: Three O'Clock! Think about that. If you were a typical working person picking up the morning paper on the way to your day job, and you didn't make a point of going out to get the Justin Morneau medallion on your lunch break Tuesday afternoon, you're out of luck. You probably couldn't even get one on your way home from work. Sorry, suckers. See you at e-bay! Of course, the prescient sellers on e-bay tried to tell me on Sunday: "Sold Out in Hours!" I guess they were in a position to know, working on the inside.

Over on e-bay at this minute, the Morneau medallion is already selling for upwards of $15.50. This is less than 24 hours after the coupon hit the street!

My dear Star Tribune and Twins marketing folk, is this really what you had in mind?


At 5/25/2005 9:34 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

We've been trying to selectively get a few of these for our two five-year-olds. Went to the nearby Holiday station at 7:15 this morning and was told they had no more Torii Hunter medallions. 7:15 AM!!! Went home and called Cub and was told they don't go on sale until 8AM and there was a line of 15 people.

I'm calling the Strib today to cancel my subscription.

At 5/26/2005 9:48 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey, frightwig - this is the guy from Contrarian Bias over at

Just thought you might like to see this:

The Strib and the company that are running the medallion promotion are putting out one more coupon, good for any of the last four medallions, plus they're saying if you mail in a coupon for any medallion, they'll print one up for you for the original price. (At least, I think that's what they said. It's late, after all.)

Sometimes the good guys do win.

At 5/26/2005 11:24 PM, Blogger frightwig said...

Thanks for the tip. I get the impression that the deal covers just the last 4 medallions--so if I want to get that Joe Mauer which sold about as quickly as the Morneau and Hunter did, I still have to pay e-bay prices. But I'll look into it to make sure.

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