The Secret of Frisco's Success

Brace yourself. For what I'm about to show you may shock you to the core and shake your faith in our American institutions, the foundations of our democracy, and the integrity of our greatest game. As a Twins fan, it may lead to long nights of soul-searching and hard looks into the mirror.

Parents, you may need to hold a family meeting to talk about this. Your children may have a lot of questions, like, Is it okay to cheer for the Twins even if they're cheaters? I don't envy you; I don't know the answer to that. For some innocent young cherubs, professional counseling may be needed to handle that kind of existential crisis.

Okay, you've been warned. Now...

While watching Francisco Liriano pitch in Saturday's game in Cleveland, during the 7th inning I noticed him blowing on the ball several times while standing on the mound. I wish it were not so, but, look, I collected photographic proof....

See:




Now, I realize that the pitchers had permission to blow on their hands last Saturday because of the nippy weather, and I'd hate to get young Frisco into any hot water, but I still gotta wonder: even when it's cold, isn't blowing directly onto the ball still illegal? You can't throw spitters just because there's a chill in the air, can you?

Yet here he is, blowing on the baseball:



And here he is, doing it again!



These are just four instances I photographed while Liriano was pitching to Jhonny Peralta and Travis Hafner. Who knows how much cheating might be uncovered if George Mitchell took an interest. Hey, Patrick Fitzgerald: you got five minutes? This could be serious!

Really, what do we tell the children?!? I wish I had the answers.

Godspeed, and no breathalyzer jokes, please.